| Match 1 | 764 votes |
|---|
| Turned Up Clocked On Laid Off | 399 | 52% |
| Asparagus Next Left | 365 | 48% |
| Match 2 | 701 votes |
|---|
| Tending The Wrong Grave For 23 Years | 359 | 51% |
| Paintball’s Coming Home | 342 | 49% |
| Match 3 | 670 votes |
|---|
| Restless Legs | 358 | 53% |
| Evening Of Swing (Has Been Cancelled) | 312 | 47% |
| Match 4 | 656 votes |
|---|
| Westward Ho! – Massive Letdown | 212 | 32% |
| Everything’s AOR | 444 | 68% |
| Match 5 | 684 votes |
|---|
| Descent Of The Stiperstones | 193 | 28% |
| For What Is Chatteris… | 491 | 72% |
| Match 6 | 663 votes |
|---|
| Bob Wilson – Anchorman | 343 | 52% |
| Rock And Roll Is Full Of Bad Wools | 320 | 48% |
| Match 7 | 627 votes |
|---|
| The Light at the End of the Tunnel | 430 | 69% |
| When The Evening Sun Goes Down | 197 | 31% |
| Match 8 | 633 votes |
|---|
| Swerving the Checkatrade | 294 | 46% |
| Them’s The Vagaries | 339 | 54% |
| Match 9 | 561 votes |
|---|
| The Unfortunate Gwatkin | 144 | 26% |
| National Shite Day | 417 | 74% |
| Match 10 | 562 votes |
|---|
| The Trumpton Riots | 291 | 52% |
| We Built This Village On A Trad Arr Tune | 271 | 48% |
| Match 11 | 545 votes |
|---|
| Joy In Leeuwarden (We Are Ready) | 200 | 37% |
| All I Want For Christmas Is A Dukla Prague Away Kit | 345 | 63% |
| Match 12 | 543 votes |
|---|
| Thy Damnation Slumbereth Not | 164 | 30% |
| Joy Division Oven Gloves | 379 | 70% |
| Match 13 | 566 votes |
|---|
| Dickie Davies Eyes | 213 | 38% |
| Every Time a Bell Rings | 353 | 62% |
| Match 14 | 539 votes |
|---|
| Terminus | 287 | 53% |
| Eno Collaboration | 252 | 47% |
| Match 15 | 554 votes |
|---|
| A Country Practice | 288 | 52% |
| Knobheads on Quiz Shows | 266 | 48% |
| Match 16 | 586 votes |
|---|
| Twenty Four Hour Garage People | 366 | 63% |
| Outbreak of Vitas Gerulaitis | 220 | 37% |
✉ Letters Sent (75)
Skip to the most recent comment
(7 years ago by Transit Full Of Keith)
Chris The Siteowner
Wow – three of the first four turned out to have been on a knife-edge! I’d have said “Tending” was an upset, although our studio pundit Two Fat Feet called it. He might be surprised by Match 3 though.
16 July 2019
Two fat feet
Only one out with TUCOLO as well. Surprised at Match 3 but pleased – this was a close one for me to call personally but RL is an underrated classic.
16 July 2019
dickhead in quicksand
That’s three of my horses still in with a chance at Wimbledon. Or something.
@CtSO – the numbers of votes look good, at around 700. What was typical in 2015?
16 July 2019
Chris The Siteowner
About 400–600, so given the increase in Baguette Dilemma round voters this year, I was expecting 600–700. And so it came to pass…
16 July 2019
Chris The Siteowner
Do you folks want me to “reveal” the losing songs’ position in the Baguette Dilemma Round as they get knocked out?
16 July 2019
Lord leominster
Oh look. Match 1 is a re-run of Brexit. And I voted the same way for both (but I’m not saying which way I voted so as not to alienate 52% of the electorate).
16 July 2019
The harbinger of nothing
Disappointed but not surprised at the result of tie #4. Pleased with #1 and #2. #3 was pretty much a dead heat for me anyway so would have been happy either way.
I vote yes to revealing the Baguette Dilemma positions!
16 July 2019
Gipton Teenager
50/50 for me.
I think I’d rather remain ignorant (not difficult for me ) of the losers’ positions in the BDR. Maybe it will extend the fun after the final with minimum tension.
16 July 2019
Irk the purists
As a contrarian I’m very impressed with myself for the first 4 results … I voted in the minority for each of them.
Fingers crossed for the next set of results.
17 July 2019
Paul f
Massive letdown.
17 July 2019
Two fat feet
I clearly think about this sort of thing far too much, but given that the point of not revealing the top 32 positions was to avoid it influencing the voting, it would make sense not to reveal any until it is all finished. Having said that, I’m not sure it makes such a difference; the only time revealing songs’ scores as they were eliminated would really tell us anything is if it got to the sharp end of the tournament and there was an apparent mismatch, but the table revealed that the remaining songs were quite close.
How about this as an unnecessarily complicated and convoluted compromise, which I only thought of while writing the previous paragraph – reveal the scores of eliminated songs, but only their position among those songs eliminated to date, so after this round you’ll have a table of sixteen but you won’t know where the gaps are to fit the remaining songs until they are also eliminated; thus even when the final comes round, you won’t actually know whether one is a front-runner and one is mid-table, or it’s a clash of two top songs, or they could in theory even have been 31 and 32.
17 July 2019
Chris The Siteowner
Perfect; just the right balance of complication, convolution and compromise. So, I can exclusively reveal that the defeated songs so far appeared in this order in the Baguette Dilemma Round:
– Evening Of Swing (Has Been Cancelled)
– Asparagus Next Left
– Westward Ho! – Massive Letdown
– Paintball’s Coming Home
I think I can also intrigue you all with the stat that two of the four fixtures did not go the way that would be expected from the Baguette Dilemma Round formbook…
17 July 2019
PAul f
Massive Massive Letdown letdown.
17 July 2019
PETER MCORNITHOLOGIST
Ezekiel is prowling the backstreets of Hartlepool punching anything that moves.
17 July 2019
Chris The Siteowner
Shocker in Match 6.
17 July 2019
dickhead in quicksand
Match 6 was another Brexit result. Nigel Farrago would have called for a rerun.
17 July 2019
PETER MCORNITHOLOGIST
High art will not ensue .
17 July 2019
Windy miller
Chatteris the Man City of the Cup so far 72% surely the nation has spoken and Chatteris must leave the UK by Halloween
17 July 2019
TBA
Gutted for Bad Wools, especially as Bob Wilson is particularly glib
17 July 2019
Lord leominSter
Match 6, too? That’s the third time I’ve found myself in the 48% minority wondering how 52% of voters could be so wrong.
17 July 2019
GOK wan ACOLYTE
Not sure BWA’s victory is that much of a surprise. Didn’t it make the last 8 in 2015? To paraphrase Bruce on Strictly “Clearly a popular choice with the viewers”
17 July 2019
I, problem chimp
People obviously go for quantity over quality when it comes to chandlers then…
17 July 2019
Poopleby
How can we measure “quality” when it comes to chandlers? NB57 himself describes them as “fine”.
17 July 2019
I, problem chimp
True enough, I just imagine Bunners being afforded a more emphatically positive adjective than simply ‘fine’… I used to live just down the road from Chatteris and, though the aforementioned stores are sadly little more than a figment of NB57’s imagination, I’ve done enough pottering around the shops there to be fairly confident in stating that you’d be sorely disappointed if you made the journey into town with a view to purchasing, say, a set of post-apocalyptic Allen keys…
17 July 2019
irk the purists
OK, so this time I only got 3 out of 4 ‘wrong”.
So 7 out of 8 so far … fingers crossed for the next results.
18 July 2019
Gipton Teenager
Now I’ve got 3 out of 8 “right”. Well them’s the vagaries, I guess.
18 July 2019
jodrell Banksy
I am 1 for 8 so far – and my all-time track is coming in tomorrow… fingers X’d for wakeful Damnation…
18 July 2019
jodrell Banksy
… 1 “right” out of 8, I meant…
18 July 2019
Chris The Siteowner
Here we go with the third batch of results, and they include the fourth time in the knockout phase where a song unfavoured after the Baguette Dilemma Round managed to get its act together on the day and cause an upset.
18 July 2019
dickhead in quicksand
Gwatkin was unfortunate.
18 July 2019
Poopleby
Vicar shit!
18 July 2019
Lord leominster
At last I am on the right side of the 52:48 split. (But I was on the wrong side for all the others revealed today.)
18 July 2019
Welsh goth
Matches 9-12. The up and coming youths unable to overcome the legends. I found these matches very hard to judge for that very reason
18 July 2019
Two fat feet
Two hammerings as predicted, and not far off with the actual score on either. However I don’t feel any better for that having seen Damnation have its arse handed back to it on a plate by a join-the-dots crowd-pleaser …
18 July 2019
I, problem chimp
Wow, on the wrong side of all the last four and actually a bit meh about the remaining four ties… The difference between me and all the other fans….
18 July 2019
Gipton Teenager
Any idea why the number of votes cast is going down CtSO?
I’m now 5 from 12, but I reckon I’ll get at least 3 “right” in the final batch.
18 July 2019
Chris The Siteowner
@GT: I think it’s because more people came to the site in the days when there were only the first 4 or 8 to vote for, than came to the site when there were only the last 4 or 8; and for those who came in the middle when all 16 fixtures were available simultaneously, the commitment required to vote on all 16 proved too much. I plugged the last 4 on the Facebook group tonight, so let’s see if that has an impact.
18 July 2019
Two fat feet
I thought the Facebook group had disappeared (again). I certainly don’t remember upsetting anyone for ages.
18 July 2019
dickhead in quicksand
This round was a bit like a much-extended version of the Cricket World Cup (I’m talking five-day Tests). We don’t know as yet which politician will claim credit for the victory in the final.
18 July 2019
Edward Ian L'Ampoon
I don’t have children, but if I had, I would have found it far easier to pick one of them to be sacrificed, rather than make some of the choices I have had to make during this round. The child’s name would have been long forgotten before I came to terms with the early elimination of Gwatkin
18 July 2019
jodrell Banksy
Am I a narky blert for thinking of “We Built this Village…” as the song “Chatteris” wishes it could be? There must’ve been a chip-pan fire at the Chigley end of town…
18 July 2019
Gipton Teenager
@CTSO- Commodore voters?
18 July 2019
EXXO
Not a narky blert at all. Just someone who hasn’t got to grips with the difference between the way well-heeled local parishioners might envision their Sussex ‘Coppers’ type village and the way estate agents might hype up a rather dull Fenland market town. But you’re right about the respective subtlety of the satire.
18 July 2019
Transit full of keith
I’d like to think Ferd Krone voted several times in match 11, and has much spite for the victor.
19 July 2019
Transit full of keith
(Sorry. Crone).
Also, I can’t say I have any spite for JDOG as my gateway drug to Biscuitry, but surely, surely ‘Thy Damnation’ deserved better than that.
19 July 2019
EXXO
@Keith. Again, it’s about ‘favourite’, a lazy concept, v. ‘best’, a concept which requires deeper evaluation from as many points of view as you can think of, and perhaps some education into what is happening in the piece, if that is not obvious.
I’m sure that future generations will list ‘Thy Damnation’ in the top twenty most undersestimated HMHB songs by our generation, using (down with) this sort of thing as evidence, but judging by some comments on here in the last three editions of this contest, JDOG is often very much underestimated too. The exquisite delicacy of its surreal imagery suggests years more crafting than many other four-chord rhyming couplet ditties, and as usual the underestimation is cos (i) people just don’t some of the imagery, and you just pity anyone who does not quite visualise what’s going on in the kitchen in 3-D with some of the lines, but that’s ‘cos (ii) they are not fully immersed in the cultural background to, and attitude of, the song. I’ve even seen people on the internet, notparticularly immersed in 80’s post-punk culture, who think it’s some kind of parody of Joy Division themselves!
As an easy example tie of how the favourite of two great tracks is generally the most easily accessible song, take a tie between two tracks which are both about TV football coverage. Everyone who votes R&RiFoBW understands how good a song Bob Wilson is – it’s utterly brilliant – but knows R&RiFoBW is an even better track, whether recorded or live, requiring months and years more crafting of the imagery and musical layers, surely. But clearly, not everyone who votes Bob Wilson knows how utterly brilliant R&RiFoBW is, because it is less accessible. No song, by anyone, has ever demolished a particular TV programme so successfully – I wonder how many voters even share the song’s antipathy towards Tim Lovejoy and his crudpile excuse for a Saturday morning show? No, you don’t absolutely need to know the show, if you can sense it, but it helps.
19 July 2019
IRK THE PURISTS
Well 2 out of 4 ‘wrong’ this time (or ‘right’ depending on your view point) so it looks like I’m getting more mainstream … sigh!
Still 9 out of 12 wrong so far so I got to be OK with that, pull up me socks and look forward to reversing the trend in the next batch.
19 July 2019
Chris The Siteowner
One more upset (based on the Baguette Dilemma Round) in the final four results. But two songs from the new album have made it through to the last 16…
19 July 2019
Chris The Siteowner
And as promised for our studio analysts, the full list of plucky losers and surprised big names who’ve been knocked out in this round, in order of how well they did in the Baguette Dilemma Round:
Evening Of Swing (Has Been Cancelled)
We Built This Village On A Trad Arr Tune
When The Evening Sun Goes Down
Rock And Roll Is Full Of Bad Wools
Joy In Leeuwarden (We Are Ready)
Thy Damnation Slumbereth Not
Asparagus Next Left
Descent Of The Stiperstones
Knobheads on Quiz Shows
The Unfortunate Gwatkin
Eno Collaboration
Westward Ho! – Massive Letdown
Outbreak of Vitas Gerulaitis
Dickie Davies Eyes
Paintball’s Coming Home
Swerving the Checkatrade
19 July 2019
Welsh goth
Good to see the ‘kids’ getting through. I have found voting painful since the last 32 and could easily have voted for either song. I have never had a favourite hmhb song and the cup is exactly why that will forever be the case.
19 July 2019
I, problem chimp
Bah! Last four all ‘right’ but probably the ties I had least strong opinions on…
19 July 2019
Two fAt feet
13/16 then, both (I think) in predictions and my choices. Most upset to lose Damnation and Westward Hoooooooo but them’s the aviaries.
19 July 2019
Pirx the purist
Bye bye, Dickie. :-(
A tough draw, although I’m surprised at the margin of victory.
I’m surprised in the other direction by how close #14 was.
19 July 2019
The harbinger of nothing
Match 15. Gutted. We should hang you up in chains. (I nearly wrote something about knobheads on lyrics projects, but thought better of it. And besides, ACP is a good song.)
Have you got the file for Mr Out-In-Round-Two?
19 July 2019
The harbinger of nothing
I reacted the same as the punters in half of the ties. Does that make me an average fan?
Onto the “16 Camps of Hope” round!
(Thanks – duly stolen – CtSO)
19 July 2019
The harbinger of nothing
A good number of top, top players. No crocks of shit.
19 July 2019
Gipton Teenager
A good show in the last quarter means that I’m 8/16. A favourable draw and maybe I can get all the quarter-finalists. Oh but then what?
19 July 2019
Lord leominsTer
Yet another cursed 48:52 loss. Despite our differences, when it comes to our collective man:biscuit score we are a clear 50:50.
19 July 2019
Pirx the purist
10/16 for me.
20 July 2019
EXXO
@Leo:
Surely the Bob Wilson result is Britshit in the truest sense, with the better more significant song losing, due in large part to lack of understanding by uneducated sections of the public.
In two of the other 52-48 cases the better, more significant, most finely crafted song has won, and in tie one, where you can’t really split them on ‘better’, the most important song thematically has won, so the better result for history.
Historically, just blips, like Britshit.
20 July 2019
Transit full of keith
8/16 agreement with Joe Public and the General Consensus for me. Would’ve been 9/16 if I hadn’t gone for Gwatkin because of its underdog status. It really is one of one of the songs that can stand toe to toe with Shite Day, also, the discussion thread about it is one of the best things on this site.
20 July 2019
Lord leominster
@Exxo
Thanks. I dont know about art but I know what I like. ?
20 July 2019
Pirx The Purist
@EXXO
I think that – especially but not exclusively in the BDR – sometimes you can’t remember how a song goes, even with part of the lyrics provided.
Part of this is down to those numerous songs in the canon whose titles don’t readily identify (or identify at all) the content. For instance, I couldn’t remember how A Country Practice went even with the opening lyrics, because those aren’t the lyrics I remember most from the song. “Fifteen minutes of mantra-filled oompah” would have done the job. There are so many tracks which fit this pattern (as one would expect from a band who have released only two albums which have an actual ‘title track’ (TLP & UFO).
And when voting in the BDR, which of us would have gone to the trouble of going to listen to the track we don’t remember when that might be the case fifty or more times?
It’s not just down to ‘catchiness’ is what I’m saying.
20 July 2019
IRK THE PURISTS
Just for completeness 2 out of 4 ‘wrong’ again in the final round so my total is 11 out of 16 wrong.
Not bad but after such a strong start (all 4 wrong) a tad disappointing.
Still as Harbinger says, onward to the “16 Camps of Hope” round!
20 July 2019
EXXO
I certainly wasn’t implying that catchiness wasn’t a worthy criterion, amongst many others…
But you can make an argument that on certain vital issues there should be an exam before you are allowed to vote.
Hmm. Capitals of Europe and their size, perhaps.
20 July 2019
103-V-504
Still can’t believe the Chatteris-Stiperstones result. The former is about as meh an HMHB song as you can get whilst there’s possibly a 3-part ITV drama starring Suranne Jones as Lynette McMorrough to be made from the latter.
The final is going to throw up a Halep v S. Williams scenario where a feisty little scrapper will overcome one of the GOATs. In which case I’ll say that RL will beat NSD.
20 July 2019
EXXo
@comparetheamp.com
If by any rare chane you are a football addict and have seen and recall the film ‘The Damned United’, I am still waiting for one single piece of love, ever, for the best thing I’ve ever, ever written on here (which may not be saying much, but I have written a lot on here).
Post 21 in this thread:
http://www.halfmanhalfbiscuit.uk/the-lux-familiar-cup-semi-finals-match-2/#comment-23112
20 July 2019
Vitas Gerulaitis
Some very disappointing results. Obviously Vitus getting hammered by a third rate nursery rhyme. Village edged out by the boomers. The underwhelming yet over-rated TTV somehow managing to beat the life affirming Checkatrade.
I really don’t understand the love for NSD, like HMHB for beginners. TUG was a good contender but there’s only one way this poll is going and I don’t like it. I don’t like it one bit.
20 July 2019
The harbinger of nothing
I was thinking to myself that, despite being over, this round ought to posthumously be awarded a better name than the Round of 32. Something was bugging me about that number. Then it came to me. It’s a bit clunky, but…
The Page 32, It’s A Bad Review Round
20 July 2019
The harbinger of nothing
I’m not sure whether “The 8 Christening Invites Round” or “The 4 Skinny Indie Kids Round” ought to usurp a simple Quarter Final and Semi Final, but I guess they are options.
Hmmm…. HMHB by numbers… Could be an idea for a future page to stave off the inevitable post-LFC blues. A sample entry could be:
71: Bus that goes down Bridge Street.
21 July 2019
Chris The Siteowner
@Exxo: I for one remembered Peace’s piece fondly four years later!
21 July 2019
dr desperate
The Summer Eights Round? The Mötley Crüe Round? The Dressing Gown Final?
21 July 2019
cream cheese and chives
Presumably the winner would be Mathematically Safe although as we all know league form counts for nothing in the cup.
To that end, I like to imagine a huge Spotify based Blue Peter Appeal like totaliser which updates with each play of a song. Clearly CD/LP plays would not register but would the LFC winner secure a double by ‘claiming top spot’ by merit of most plays?
I like the sense of rage expressed here in response to certain results and the almost blind incomprehension at certain songs winning through against apparently more fancied opposition.Each of us has favourites while other songs languish in the lower reaches of our affections . For instance, I cannot understand why anyone would not like NSD . Conversely, JDOG has always left me cold.
As Tommy Docherty used to say,’Football’s all about opinions.’ Mind you, I am told that he also said,’If she were my daughter ,I’d still be bathing her,’ when presenting an award at a legal profession function in Manchester.
21 July 2019
EXXo
@Chris (comment 71). Thank you. At least that proves someone read it!
26 July 2019
transit full of keith
I’ve now read it as well. Can recommend.
26 July 2019